7 Tips for a Better You
If there is one thing I’m am really good at, it is avoiding seeing people who knew me when I was young. Elementary school was awesome because I was one of the “cool” kids. Unfortunately, a transfer to a private school in sixth grade flipped my world upside down and I felt like an outcast all the way through high school. I referred to it as being on the fringe. College helped me reset how I felt about myself and my status in life. Moving to another state really did the trick because I was judged only on the me of that time. Blogging and becoming involved in social media marketing helped me flourish, set bigger goals for myself and become a happier person.
While I do have some friends I would like to spend more time with, for the most part I avoid my past like the plague. It just brings back too many haunting memories. Outside of that, I’m a very social person with no qualms about talking to total strangers, speaking on a panel at a conference or being filmed for a video.
On New Year’s Eve my brother (finally) got married. I looked at the invited guests and felt immediate anxiety at seeing some old schoolmates on the list. At the event, seeing these people wasn’t as uncomfortable as I thought it would be. People who I had not seen in years walked up to me and said “I wasn’t sure I would recognize anyone but I definitely recognized you.”
That made me feel much better. Actually, it made me feel kind of good. Despite the fact that I’m aging, I generally feel pretty good about myself. I don’t look like my 20-something self, but I think I wear mid-40s pretty well. Maybe it’s because I’m learning to age gracefully, but I like to believe it is because I’m taking care of myself. Here are some of my tips:
Be positive.
Always BE the best you can. I don’t mean in a competitive way, but rather a person who others want to be around. Walk with a smile, do the right thing even when others aren’t and treat others the way you wish to be treated. If you are perpetually negative, others will see that. More important, you will feel the effects of a pessimistic attitude. Be happy with the person you see looking back at you in the mirror.
Take care of your body, mind and soul.
Eat right, exercise, do brain activities and find things that make you feel good about yourself. Even if you struggle to stay on target with the things that help you achieve happiness, remember that each morning you wake up to a new beginning. Wipe the slate clean of things that are bothering you. Leave grudges in the past. Forgive and forget arguments you may have been involved in. Couldn’t find time or ambition to exercise yesterday? Do something today, even if that means just a walk around the block or parking further from the entrance to the store. This also means making family a priority. Eat together, exercise together, play together. Enjoy the company, love and companionship of parents, children, siblings and even pets.
Avoid or limit “sin tax” items.
I’ve never smoked or used tobacco products. Ever. I’ve never had any urges to do so, either. When I was in college, my best friend always asked people not to smoke around me because it made me sick. It still does. While I do enjoy a cocktail or glass of wine occasionally, I limit myself. Even at events with an open bar, I make a point to stop at two. I can’t be happy with myself (see #1) if I’m stumbling over things – literally and figuratively.
Be aware of the sun.
A tan can be beautiful, but there are more concerns than skin cancer. Have you ever seen a person who spent a lot of time in the sun but didn’t take care of their skin? I know people my age and younger who spent so much time sunbathing their skin looks like leather. Always remember that sunscreen is your friend.
Use makeup that works for you.
There are some make-up products I use that are inexpensive, others that are mid-priced and some that are considered luxury. I use a mix of products that don’t cause my skin to break out. My favorites are Almay and Bare Minerals. Since I use minimal amounts of make-up, the money I spend on makeup goes a long way.
Take care of your skin.
It wasn’t until recently that I realized the importance of a skin care routine. I’m not one to wear a lot of makeup so I’ve never felt the need to create a cleansing regimen at the end of the day. When I shower in the morning, I pay much more attention than ever before. In addition to cleansing my face, I apply serums, creams and moisturizers, preferably ones with SPF properties (see #4).
Mind your check-ups.
I’ll be the first to admit I hate visiting the doctor, dentist and all the other medical mumbo jumbo. However, it is necessary. Preventive care is important followed closely by early detection. If you have a concern about something, don’t be afraid to inquire. An unusual lump or consistent headaches. If you are mindful of your overall well-being (see #3), it will help in the long run. As an example, I recently contacted my dentist and asked if they could look at something on my tooth. It wasn’t bothering me, but I knew it wasn’t right. They checked it out and confirmed it was very early stages of a cavity forming. I was surprised when they said this was a first for them. They never had anyone make that request; it was extremely early and barely noticeable. I noticed. That’s what mattered. Had I waited until my check-up, or even worse, delayed an appointment, it would have been a much more severe problem (both medically and financially).
I’ve discovered that the best approach to living happily is being happy with myself. Utilizing these tactics has been a sure-fire way to do it.
What do you do to take care of yourself?
These are great tips! We are especially big on the sun one. My hubby has had 4 skin cancers removed now – stemming from a childhood where he was never made to wear sunscreen. It certainly has lasting effects!
Great tips! Especially the sun – gotta make sure to keep the sun out of the hands too because aging hands are NOT fun.
I can so relate to not wanting to be a part of my past! Bad memories, poor self esteem issues and the like make me avoid those reunions and getting in touch with old schoolmates. Luckily all of that is behind me and I am happy to say I use all of your tips on a daily basis – nothing is more important than self care. Leave the past to where it belongs and focus on the here and now!
I bake in the sun all summer long because I like to rock a killer tan. I know I will pay for it someday, but today I want to look awesome.
Great tips! I definitely take care of my skin by washing it morning and night and using moisturizers and sunscreen daily. You look great!
Those are all really good tips and I know exactly how you felt about seeing old school friends. As for having my picture taken–there are very few around—you gotta be real sneaky to get a picture of me!
Those are some very good tips! I try not to look back, but it is hard when friends have aged a little better than I have.
I completely avoid the sun! I gave it up about 15 years ago and I don’t miss it at all. I definitely have gotten better about caring for myself.
I agree with all of the tips. It’s important to remember to take care of us too, not just everyone around us. 🙂
These are great ideas. Thanks!
Im horrible about keeping up with check ups. I always make sure my kids go to theres but never have time for myself. Go figure 🙂
Great tips. Thanks for sharing.
These are amazing tips and couldn’t have come at a better time! I am so hard on myself and can find myself being a negative Nelly quite frequently. I am going to certainly take your tips and use them!
Good reminders, we all need them once in a while. Nice to know that lots of people have that fear of seeing people from our “awkward ages”! LOL
I am the best ME I can be by making time for myself. I also really like your tip about being positive!
I definitely need to take care of my skin better. Oh and stay out of so much sun but it’s kind of difficult in So Cal 😉
These are really good ideas! I’ve been taking steps to get in better shape this year and so far I’ve had great results.
Being positive is so important when it comes to confidence and self-image. I’m glad that you were finally able to overcome some of those fears and insecurities.
Great tips, and I agree with all of them, especially #1. It’s so important just to be the best person you can be every day, and only ever compete with yourself.
What a wonderful article I could see every point you made that they made sense; you are so talented! You have a way about you; you can relate to any crowd or any friend!!!
Trish
I hate having my picture taken too and I’m 26! But you wear your age very well!
I love that they recognized you at your brother’s wedding! I don’t like my picture taken, but I have learned to do it regularly in the last few years so the kids have memories of me later. 🙂
I think you’re a beautiful woman, I grew up with bad body image and was very self conscious. I can definitely relate to this article a lot. It’s hard being a woman, not that being a man isn’t hard but I feel there is so much pressure on us to be pretty more than there is to be happy.
A lot of helpful tips here! 1# is the best tip Like your self first, and be the best person you can be at all times.Not just in Public all of the time.
I really like the tips you shared! I hate my picture taken and try to escape whenever I can. I’m glad that in the end you had a great time with your old schoolmates.
Great tips – especially about the sun. I just had basal cell skin cancer removed from my nose & it left a hole. Now I need plastic surgery to repair the hole.
being careful about tanning is important!
being careful about tanning is very important!
Thanks for sharing, I definitely would love to try this.
Great tips…It’s a good reminder of what we need to do everyday!!
Lots of great tips that I try to do however reminders are great. I think my fave is “do the right thing even if others aren’t” Love that 😀
Great tips. Remember to sit out in the sun for a few minutes a day to get natural Vit D but NOT during 10am-4pm. I drink some coffee around 8am and get 10 minutes of sunlight…lifts my mood too! Whether it’s freezing or hot, I ALWAYS wear sunscreen.
Great article. Like you, I was not fond of my HS experience and have typically kept my distance from that part of my life. Funny thing, if we knew the. What we know now, things would have been more pleasant. I went to the same school as you and as youth often do, I felt I was the only one feeling the solitude. Anyway, great article!
I really like all your tips. For me (your #2 – taking care of your soul), is what keeps me happy, sane, and healthy. I go to bed every night and wake up every morning grateful….I don’t take things for granted and I appreciate everything. For me it puts things in perspective and makes life and everything in it joyous..
True, you have to be careful about how you exposed to sun during summer. I like to meet my old school friends. Love all your tips.
Great tips and I think you look great too!
Lot of it’s common sense..
Interesting.
Really great tips! I have a reunion coming up and I need some touch ups before hand. I was bed ridden for a time and gained a lot of weight. Now that I’m up and about I can walk and exercise and and losing my weight. I shouldn’t let it bother me, but I was so small in HS and to me, I don’t look like my old self.
I hope your reunion went well! I don’t look like my old self either, Karen, but neither do a lot of my classmates. We’ve all aged. 🙂 Congrats on walking and exercising and losing your weight. Don’t spend too much time looking in the rear view mirror. Look ahead!
Thank you so much for sharing! I’m doing most of those things already…but I needed a nudge on paying attention to my body and then listening to what it’s saying!